Sunday, 25 July 2010

Saying yes

We're still feeling our way as to how to live happily with two children but there are melt your heart moments in amongst the stresses. Isaac really wants to cuddle Isabel a lot (although putting her down again isn't always very gentle). Occasionally he lets me take photos of their interactions.

We've been making the most of the parks today. Norfolk really needs some rain (although I'd be happy for it to wait until we've gone home again). The grass in the parks is brown and crunchy and the ground baked dry. Not that the boy cares.

I've been trying to change my reflex responses. Isaac has struggled to share my attention since Isabel's arrival and he's also heading into that threenage stage with the tantrums to match. I'm tired and often achy and it makes me grumpy. My reflex response tends to get more and more negative the less energy I have and then Isaac ends up having a tantrum and it all spirals downwards. It's hard to balance a 'say yes' philosophy - which is where I want to be - with a boy who is testing the boundaries and who needs to know where he stands. I've found it hard to keep the balance of saying yes without being overly permissive. Today I read a great summary of why and how to always say yes and it's helped me to clarify in my head how I want to be and given me some ideas of how to go about it. Now all I have to work out is how to reconcile it all with a boy who still has that toddler need for everything to happen NOW.

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